Apotheosis through Adversity

            All Machiavellian speculations on whether it’s better to be loved or feared aside, I have come to the conclusion that if you find yourself unloved, fear is an excellent consolation prize. The weak and obsequious are too often easily afforded something that passes itself off as love, some sort of a consolation prize for playing to people’s vanities I suppose, while the strongest will almost always be feared, particularly wherever and whenever their relative strengths must be undeniably recognized. As stated in one of my favorite slogan’s attributed to the Bavarian Illuminati: Oderint dum Metuant, “Let them hate, provided they fear.”

           Complications, of course, may arise as one struggles to preserve a clear and healthy perspective, as well as a sincere sense of humor, in the face of all this fear that will be irrationally projected onto him or herself. The ego will swell and warp to occupy whatever shape best serves in the continual harvest of this sweet rotten fruit. In fact, it’s possible to become so addicted to being feared, especially in the absence of any more positive regard, particularly any sort of deep and compassionate understanding, that one may find one’s self spiritually poisoned, or, at least, psychologically malnourished, on such a potentially dangerous and unhealthy diet of infamy.

            Despite many people's rather verbose arguments to the contrary, actual Magick is either feared, scorned, or simply disregarded almost everywhere I attempt to create it. If Einstein's definition of insanity holds true, it should be easy enough for me to continue to inflict my own brand of insanity on a world that takes little to no notice of any of these new and strange actions.

            Sadly, either he’s wrong about insanity allowing one to perform the same actions again and again while expecting different results or else I’m not quite insane enough yet. I’ll have to work on that, what with this quietly growing zombie apocalypse I see expanding all around me. Cowans.

            One last thing bears explaining: In the Aquarian Age, darkness reigns supreme, despite whatever misinformation you were sold by the endless waves of hippies who argued to the contrary. You will be ruled from the shadows by forces that bear little resemblance to anything of which you’ve been provided a mental framework to comprehend and, despite your perpetual toiling and slaving towards their ends and not your own, you will, in general, be none the wiser. These incomprehensible forces will allow you to dig yourself deeper and deeper into a pit of infantile helplessness simply to increase the relative distance between themselves and you, all because it makes their own worldly attainments and metaphysical comprehensions all the more impressive.

            When I was younger and more idealistic, this idea concerned me quite a bit, not because I worried about being left in the dark as much as I didn’t want to have to ascend into such a cruel and inhuman place, simply to remain free of what I can now see are its apparently inevitable oppressions. However, I can now understand that no one ever really goes anywhere except in relation to this one fundamental idea, that sense of an every looming and incomprehensible danger, the possibility of these unseen masters of evil falling upon you at any moment. Without that dynamic psychic tension, none of us would ever grow any stronger. Although most people will continue to cry out in the darkness for help, there will always be a few who are willing to learn to move about gracefully and with purpose while the lights remain off above us. The greatest luminaries, in my opinion, will only ever be born in such dark places as these anyway.

            I see now that my true task in this world isn’t to remove people’s perceived oppressions or to liberate them from their cares and worries, but rather to be pushed back against and attacked as one of those terrifying objects of fear and respect that reign above us all. At best I might attempt to help others perceive oppression in the positive and ultimately constructive manner that has helped me, and is still helping me, to rise above as I encounter it, but that position kind of reeks of condescension and vanity. No, a more direct statement of my intentions is this: I’m your new master until you can prove that I’m not.

            I would also like to encourage you to believe, wholeheartedly, that the actual Powers That Be are, in fact, unofficially out to get you, but don’t go so far as to allow yourself to surmise that you, or even I, will ever truly escape or defeat them completely. To even think such a thing would be to cut oneself off from an essential existential myth that’s been provided for those of us who are sincerely seeking to ascend, here, within a dangerous world of persistent but subtle threats, and countless other ingenious and hidden traps, all of which are designed to inevitably subjugate the individual to a wide variety of forces that really are greater than one’s own self. Therefore my new motto will be: Apotheosis through self-maintained adversity. How perfect the world becomes, and yet still, for some reason, most of us remain like seeds ignorantly complaining about how we're all covered in dirt. Again, stupid cowans.

            To quote a message sent by Marshal Ferdinand Foch in the first battle of the Marne: “My centre is giving way, my right is retreating, situation excellent, I am attacking.” Although I will continue to be amused by the number of people I meet who are stupid enough to fear me from the door, I will still freely admit that I think the stupidest ones to be those who don’t fear me at all; because fear, after all, is the key to understanding power, just as love is the only real key by which one might unlock the mysteries of goodness itself. Good luck and Namaste.

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